I don't write on this blog often because I feel like I never have anything of importance to say. Who cares? If you're reading this blog, you must love my thoughts like I love my thoughts. I love my thoughts because they don't think it's weird when I'm thinking about saxophones or canvas or mummification or Sammy Lightfoot or long division or murals or off shore oil rigs or Harrison Ford or my fingernails or AC adapters or Spaceship Warlock or Aladdin and the King of Thieves or dissonance or chrome or Snuffaluffagus or Big Bad Beetleborgs or the South Pacific or buy one get one free deals I see in the newspaper. Sometimes I worry that I'm not a very good conversationalist because my thoughts don't transition very smoothly, so I enjoy a good think all by my lonesome. It is interesting, however, because my worries about my inability to converse well are due to my thinking too much. Quite a conundrum. An enigma wrapped in a mystery draped in a puzzle stuffed with a riddle. I say all this because I wanted to include more than just the picture of the leather jacket I will be purchasing in the near future. Also, I wanted this to be my gateway to publishing more posts that are of little consequence. Also, I am put at ease knowing that I have included a disclaimer to my readers that posts will be more frequent and less captivating.
This jacket is usually $300 but I can get it for $149.99 from Wilson's Leather. Would I be stupid not to buy it? Y
ES. So here is the deal, because this jacket would cost as much as a month of rent, we're going to need to put together a fundraiser of sorts. Here are the following things I am willing to do in addition to your anonymous donations:
$1- This will get you a closed mouth kiss if you are a lady.
$2- open mouth kiss.
$5- I will give you a 30 minute self defense lesson.
&7- I will give you a guided bicycle tour of Southwest Provo
$10- I will write and perform a song for you and include a copy of it on Compact Disc
$75- I will give you my pillow(complete with pillowcase)
Donations can be sent via the intranet with the use of credit card at: www.MikeNeedsASuperDopeLeatherJacketWhereasToReachHisPeakSexuality.gov
Thank you for your support!
Did you notice that the symbol before the 7 is an ampersand instead of a dollar sign? I did.
This jacket is usually $300 but I can get it for $149.99 from Wilson's Leather. Would I be stupid not to buy it? YES. So here is the deal, because this jacket would cost as much as a month of rent, we're going to need to put together a fundraiser of sorts. Here are the following things I am willing to do in addition to your anonymous donations:
2 comments:
so i have given this a lot of thought. i think you are funny. i am not trying to give you a compliment. i am just saying that as fact. you make me laugh. bless you for that.
my favorite part of this post you ask? (besides the fact that I was thinking about Aladdin and the king of thieves as well as Sammy lightfoot today) is that open mouth kiss words are smaller than the rest. Why is that worth less than your pillow??? Do you know that at any given time there are like a thousand million head and drool germs on pillows that could kill anyone with a weakened immune system… I mean, kissing ( although more dangerous on an emotional level) usually have less germs to deal with and is worth a lot more than the possibility of death by pillow.
I have decided I want the bicycle tour of provo. A lot. A whole lot. And I am willing to give you 7 dollars for that… however, since you “owe me your life” and all for finding your perfect word (aka: rogue) I think you should do it for free. If that does not mean anything to you anymore… Do it for my birthday. It’s in 14 days. Ima gonna be 21. I will not be drinking. Shoot.
Word of the day: pompadour.
you hate your thoughts compared to how much i love them. bold, i know. i hope you like my thoughts half as much. today I spent most of the day thinking about worms. well, i look forward to more posts and you looking hawt in that leather jacket.
p.s. I'd like to donate $1.. (you can wait to give me the kiss til summer, if ya know what I mean..)
p.p.s. you took a rain check last time i asked you to go on a bike ride so if you can take me on a bike tour and then both our debts will be relieved.
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